JimmyR
When I first walked the streets of Zürich, Switzerland during Christmas of 1995, I somehow knew that I would be tied to that place for the rest of my life. How can you explain that overwhelming feeling of 'home' for someplace you have never been? It's real, it's overpowering, and it is still there to this day. But I'm getting ahead of myself...
I went there to visit my girlfriend then and again during spring break and we had decided that we would get married in Europe sometime that summer. I was set to move at the end of the school year. I found a guy who had the best deal for flying motorcycles over to Europe, and in late June of '96 I set out with my bike packed to the hilt for my departure point of Newark, New Jersey. I made a stop in my childhood place at my Gram's house where Mom and Dad were both visiting. It seemed like the adventure of a lifetime, and lemme tell ya, it was!
Being in a totally different environment can be an exhilarating experience. It was that way for me the whole time I was in Switzerland. If anything, I felt more alive than I ever had. The people, the places, the food, the beer...you gotta go! We had lots of fun motorcycling in the Alps and around in Europe, camping our way up to crazy Amsterdam that summer.
I also ended up playing music, of course. I couldn't find a job as a motorcycle mechanic since there are a million great ones in Switzerland already, and the government would not issue me a work visa. They really hold those close to their chest, or I'd probably still be there. I had jammed with some guys while I was there in March at an open jam, and I eventually got with them and we put a little thing together. Mostly we played in the "illegal" underground clubs just for drinks and fun, but managed a few paying gigs, which really came in handy for me as I was living off my girlfriend's income.
I made fast friends with a guitar player named Andy Weilenmann, who to this day is one of my best friends and favorite people in the world. We had lots of fun, drank lots of great alcoholic beverages, and generally enjoyed life.
Of course, all good things come to an end, and when my girlfriend chose to go home at the end of her year in November, I elected not to stay. I always wonder what would have become of me if I would have just stayed around and made it through the winter. Would I be living in Zürich today?
My stay with my girlfriend was very romantic and exciting all the time we were there, up until the end. Then I could feel things change and the freeze-out began. By the time we both got back to Dallas, I was history. I think that she wanted someone with more material wealth behind them than me, and while I can dig that, I was really bad in love and this shocked me even more than the break-up with my wife. Throw on top of this worry about getting older, having nothing but failed relationships, not liking my new chosen mechanical profession, feeling alone and abandoned, not knowing which direction to take in life, and you have one big pile of hurt and confusion. I was at the lowest ebb of my existence and let's just say I didn't trust myself with myself and leave it at that. I decided that, after all these years, to go home to Mom and Dad.
'Home' was Scottsboro, Alabama a place I had never lived before. Mom and Dad had moved there after I left the nest and went to college. I didn't know what it would be like, but I knew I really had no choice, so the day after Christmas 1996 I packed everything I owned into a U-Haul truck (including my motorcycle) and headed east.
The first few weeks were terrible. I entered into therapy and found a job in the local Honda shop. I didn't know anyone but my Mom, Dad, and brother Steve who lived just a mile or so from the parents. Luckily, I met a good friend in Michael Trahan, another mechanic at the shop. He was exactly half my age, but we got along and with his positive attitude he helped me out more than he'll ever know!
To keep myself sane, I started frequenting the Sunday night blues jams over in Huntsville at the Kaffee Klatsch where I could kick out my blues and meet some fellow musicians. I also put myself on a different track career-wise when I got a job at a local computing and consulting company and put myself through MCSE courses in Huntsville. Finding girls to date around here that I could relate to was just not happening, though.
I was getting better through 1997, spending some quality time with my family and my kid brother Steve. Dad, being an old Harley man, got the bug when I brought my bike down here. Pretty soon Steve and Dad were renting bikes and we were taking some weekend rides. Just then Dad, a life-long heavy smoker, was diagnosed with lung cancer. This was the fall of 1997.
The next year was one helluva year. Gram (my Mom's mom) passed away from old age in May. Dad was continuing treatments, even riding his Harley into his radiation sessions, but we all knew it wouldn't last long. Then the shocker of all, my brother Steve was killed on his BMW R-1100 in July. That knocked out whatever wind was in Dad's sails and he died in October. The family was down to me and Mom. It was a traumatic year to say the least, but I felt that I learned something about love and fate that otherwise would have passed my by. I felt that I was led here at this particular time to spend some time with my loved ones before it was too late.
I still didn't have a band, and I still was bored here without any female companionship, and began flying to Texas to see my ex-girlfriend some. I had just gotten back from one such trip in April of 1999, when after sitting in with my friends The Crawlers in Huntsville, I met this girl named Christie. She had two kids by her marriage she was exiting due to abuse, and we hit it off really well right from the start.
I thought a whole lot about being an instant parent, even though NOTHING will prepare you for that! The more time I spent with her and the kids, the more I felt like I belonged. So to make a long story short, we were married in June of 2000. There I was husband, daddy, breadwinner of my family. Only one thing missing: guitar-player!
