Why I won't be there...Lord Tracy does Dallas 2006
Jeez! I have already been inundated with emails within the last few weeks asking me about this, so I thought the best thing to do would be to write an Opinions page on the subject of why I won't be at the Lord Tracy throw-down at the Dallas guitar show in a few weeks. That way, I can just toss 'em a link to this article that should 'splain everything where everyone gets the exact same answer. To set all this up, maybe I'd better start at the beginning. At the beginning in this millennium, anyway.
When we all first decided to do the reunion thing back a few years ago, there was no one more excited or into it than I. Terry and I would email each other a gazillion times a day, and if you know Terry at all then you know that once he gets excited about something he is unstoppable, and his excitement and drive have a way of rubbing off on you. I can tell you that I ate, slept, breathed, and talked nothing but Lord Tracy for months leading up to the event. I even talked my wife into using that as our vacation for that year. Heavy, baby!
The four of us spent lots of quality time together for an entire week before the first gig in Memphis. By 'quality time' I mean not only playing our asses off, but eating, drinking, joking, belching, farting, etc. and all the other things guys do when bonding that women never will understand. By the day of the gig, the phrase 'fever pitch' only goes about halfway in describing how we all felt. The first night was such a rush that few things in life can equal it. I know it was an insane, happy blur for me and most likely the other three guys, too. The following weekend in Dallas was pretty much the same. We felt we had made a triumphant return, and we had. Terry said, "Man, you gotta write about this!"
After I had gotten back to reality here in Alabama, I had every intention of writing about the reunion and all that we had done, and all the funny shit we talked about while we were together. I never got around to it. It seemed like every time I sat down to do it, I just couldn't make the words come out. Worse yet, I felt like I didn't even want to write about it. This bugged the shit outta me, and I just couldn't figure it out.
After the initial reunion, we got together several more times. In fact, we were pretty busy there for a bunch of guys who live at the four different points of the compass, miles and miles away from each other. Last year we were in Memphis for New Year's Eve, back there for the International Bar-B-Que during Memphis in May, in Dallas for the guitar show, and ending up at Riverfest in Little Rock Memorial Day weekend. We always had large crowds and lotsa fun. But I found I was almost dreading it every time I had to make the trip. What the hell?
By the time of the Riverfest gig I had pretty much figured it out, and I had all but made up my mind that this would be the last one I did. The event had everything going for it: huge stage, thousands upon thousands of people, and my kids would get to see me play for the first time in such cool surroundings. We had a blast, playing right before both REO Speedwagon and a torrential downpour that waited until we finished before it started. Also, we videoed the thing. Terry just sent me the DVD, and it is pretty damn good. We look great, sound great, the crowd loves us, everything you could hope for. And for me, that's where I want to leave it.
What happened? No, no one pissed me off or put me down. We had nothing but good times. Lord Tracy as an entity hasn't changed one single bit. And that is the crux of the problem. I've changed. It has not one thing to do with feeling like I have to act older, or more dignified, or whatever. It's just that I can't feel it for the music like I used to. It doesn't ring true for me anymore. God, how I'd love to be that crazy lil' dude whipping his curly locks around, socking down shots of vodka, singing about insane stuff like bad fish and going out with the boys, chanting "hey hey we want some puss-ay" but I just can't. It's stuck in a time-warp and I have moved on. Not necessarily by choice, but by the laws of nature. I want everyone to understand that I am not putting the other guys down in any way for keeping on with it. And I feel that they understand where I am coming from and respect the fact that I would rather be in either 100% or out 100% and that anything in the middle would be dishonest.
The final deciding factor for me was the Creed reunion in Memphis just before Christmas. It was everything I had personally wanted the Lord Tracy gigs to be. I had so much easy fun, and felt at peace with the whole package especially how the songs still fit me after so long. I just felt more at home doing that stuff. It was a great experience and I want to do some more. My band Blood River is playing more and more here in my area, and we're drawing increasing crowds wherever we play. I am also thinking about (re-)activating a JimmyR Band to do some blues. My musical life is still jumpin'.
So, that's it for me in Lord Tracy, at least for now. I never say never, but I have to recognize the fact that I seriously doubt they guys will ask again. I think that if you are a Lord Tracy fan, you should get your ass down to the Dallas Guitar show on April 22nd and catch them. Our buddy Brian Harris will be in my place, as he was all those years ago when my appendix decided to check out in Pittsburgh! I think it doesn't matter who does what as long as Terry and Barney are there; I've always felt that. I wish 'em all the best, and I know that we're all still friends. 'Cause fish..are still bad!
JimmyR 3/28/2006
